By: Patti

Patti — Sat, 19 Jan 2008 01:00:07 +0000

What a wonderful article.
Elizabeth Pantley is 100% right on the money with her words.
I use to feel guilty about getting upset at the kids.. Now, I work out the problems, and I am not getting upset along with the kids are not getting upset.
Elizabeth Pantley is a wonderful Parenting Author!!!!

By: catherine

catherine — Thu, 29 Nov 2007 07:40:08 +0000

My partner and I have a five year old daughter, and our guilt is running wild inside each of us. We both have bad tempers that are set off easily, and our daughter is the one that actually calms us down. She does not like it when we yell at her, we do not blame her one bit ! I have controlled my reaction time better where I think happy thoughts of her when she is doing the five year old things that get on my nerves…how can a child get on my nerves? she is an angel in my eyes, but some times I just blow at her with a tone of voice that would actually scar anyone. My partner is the same way, we ar both working very hard at controlling this, and eventhough, we blow from time to time and the guilt just eats us alive. We used to become angry with each other, but now we talk about what we can do to make her feel better instead of worse. she truly has no idea that some things she does, to a point, put us both over the edge. I am at my wits end with how to not ever yell at her, and i am beginning to feel real horrible as a mother. I have read the anger issues and we do do those things that are listed, on a daily basis, but the other night she would not sleep, it was late and i was so tired, instead i threatened to call her dad and that just upset her more, than i tried to talk with her about the importance of little people needing their sleep, non of that she understood. After, i just sat in her little chair and told her that i would stay for awhile, I do not want her to get into any habbits of sleeping with us or us sleeping with her so this was really difficult for me to do. I lied there for about 20 minites until she fell asleep and did let her know prior that this would not happen every nite. She finally fell asleep, but now i am left with the guilt of getting angry with her. I called my partner after all of this, and he just said for me to sit with her in the morning and let her know that i felt silly for getting so angry, and then just let her talk. This all is good for me and my daughter, the only thing is the damage that must be done to her and many other children that have parents who yell instead of talk…it is such a instant reaction that is very hard to break and i need to know how right now before she gets older, plus I do not want to hurt her little feelings anylonger just because i cannot hold it in. Are there other parents like this who have overcome the yelling thing, sometimes it seems to be the only way she listens. Please help us both, so we can have a happy, healthy home for all of us.

Comments on: Steps to Handling Your Anger

By: Patti

By: catherine